Chairs! The Sequel

CHAIRS!

Firstly, in my own defense against perceived attacks, I'd like to state that there's alot going on in my life-- a hell of a lot more than just chairs!  HOWEVER.  Sometimes it is simpler, more effectively cathartic to focus on the concrete.  The little things.  the chairs.

So. 

You've met Ethan Allen and Lorraine, our wonderful new livingroom chairs.  Aren't they darling?  I'm in love.  I still think of the old pair.  I'll always love and appreciate them and what they meant.  But we grow... we evolve.

Hilariously, one of our cats used to hide under the orange chair, which had a skirt.  He used to hide there to escape his tail--he has issues with his tail--but our new one doesn't have a skirt.  Hilariously he still scuttles under there to hide.  Does he think no one can see him?  Adorbs.

Lolz, not like this...

So.  Diningroom.  Recently I decided to ask our landlord if I could clean up this big, gorgeous circular dining table that was languishing in the communal garage.  I asked him if I could just sort of borrow it--keep it until it came time for us to move out (no date set, just a sort of... you know... eventuality).

He, being a sweetheart, gave us an "of course! take anything you need"  which is the same message he gave us when we firts moved in, impoverished and living in the tiny studio.

BEFORE

Like a pledge commercial!

Getting a new (to us) table, however, spurred me to the task of getting new chairs!  The only didningroom chairs we had were the very first chairs we bought as a married couple-- purchased with a $50.00 gift certificat to IKEA.  If you know anything about the price of chairs, you will know that to buy two chairs for under fifty dollars is a feat!  We purchased the best chairs we could get: two folding chairs!  We've had them ever since. 

Ours are a dark stain, but here they are!

I've since purchased chairs from biglots or something.  Couple of futureistic IKEA inspired white ones, couple of sleek modern style imitation wood ones, but all have met their demise.  Turns out chairs are expensive because a good chair isn't easy to construct.

Facsimile

The problem with the IKEA ones, despite lasting this lobg, is that they just FEEL like folding chairs, you know?  The feel like EXTRA seating.  Like, 'ok, I'll sit here if I must", but certainly not sit-all-night-and-play-games.

So I started my search in earnest.  Yardsales, antique stores, thrift stores, INTERWEBS.  That reminds me-- when did EBAY become ri-fucking-diculous?  Remember when it started and you could find bargains?  Now?  Sheesh.  Don't go looking on ebay if you want to save money.  Go to ebay if you want to overpay for other people's bullshit.



Anyway.  Weeks of craigslist, garage sales, bargain sites, free-on-the-side-of-the-road-piles, and other such avenues yielded nothing.  You see, no budget, plus rather specific tastes, equals problems.

We'd both agreed right off the bat that we could not stand any "grandma chairs".  You know what I'm talking about.  Country chairs.  Fancy chairs.  My mother's chairs.

Bleck

grrr

Despite the orange background, these are still not doing it for me!

And the ubiquitous country kitchen chair!

The problem with this stipulation, it turns out, is that these chairs were, for some time, the most popular fucking chairs in north america.  The chairs that everyone is getting rid of now?  Grandma chairs.  Everywhere.  EVERYWHERE.








We thought: well, maybe we'll pick up some of those and spraypaint them some outrageous color.  It's all the rage right now, and I happen to love it!  take something so terriblyn old-fashioned and give it an amazingly dynamite re-do!

Aren't they the sex?!?!?!?  Hearts.


But still.  We'd prefer something more square.  Less... grandma-esque.

Well we'd had some close-but-no-cigar moments.  We'd had searches that actually brought us to some other fabulous finds!  Lorraine was discovered whilst looking for dining chairs.  So was my amazing new lucite bar stool for only FIVE FUCKING DOLLARS!  compare to market price:

Divinity.

Finally I took my mother's advice and stopped off at the Teen Challenge furinture store. 

Turns out these do-gooders have some AMAZING FUCKING FURNITURE, the sale of which benefits an incredible charity.  However, I couldn't afford it.  The furniture is top notch, (local furniture stores donate!  Way to go Bernie & Phylls, and Jordan's!)and while the prices are more affordable that they would be retail, they were still unrealistic for me. 

So i wandered next door to their regular old thrift store (like Sally's) and found, to my enormous surprise, some CHAIRS!

Were they perfect like Lorraine?  No.  But were they non-grandma, and non-farmhouse?  Yup.  Did they have a little something?  Yeah.  Were they solid?  Were they a strong possibility?  YUP.

I inquired into the price.  Really?  Oh.  In that case.  Yes, I will take four chairs at six dollars a piece.  Sure thing!

So I figured out how to fit four wide-seat (for my lovely big ass) dining chairs into my buick, and away I went.  And my dollars went to a good cause!

so here they are. 

Square!  Very 1930's

  
The upholstery is stained, but will be super easy to replace, and we just happen to have a good deal of fabric we love and purchased when Saftler's was going out of business.

Our fabric choices!

They'd be easy enough to spraypaint, too, if we want to go that route, but even though they're dinged up they don't look too bad as is.

So here they are.  they need a little tighteneing.  Will get a make-over.  But here they are and my search for chairs is officially over.  It feels good.  I went to IKEA the other day with my Sister-in-law and while I could appreciate the chairs, I didn't need to lust after them with an unholy yearning!

Aaron says that this detail makes them look a little "hobbity", lol, but overall approves!

I have chairs, I am happy, and now can't wait to get the rest of the apartment in order so that we can host VISITORS to sit in these amazing chairs!!

These people need more chairs!!

Chairs...part 1

Alright.

I've been on a mission.

A divine mission to acquire seating.

Chairs.

Beautiful, delicious, yet impossibly inexpensive chairs.

My task was herculean: get my hands on a set of dining room chairs to go with the new diningroom table (a landlord's garage acquisition!), and find two living room chairs to replace the aging mid-century modern chairs in the living room.

Orange chair depicted left

Let us pause a moment and honor those incomparable orange masterpieces.  They were quite literally the first thing the husband and I owned as a married couple.  In fact, they were purchased as a surprise gift for me while I was touring the country--before we were wed; merely betrothed.

I saw them and fell instantly in love with the pair of them at our local salvation army.  There they were in all their kitschy glory: bordering on godawful, in decent shape for something older than me, and at a deliciously low price.  I know I salivated.  I may have wept a bit. 

But buy two enormous retro arm-chairs when my living arrangements included a curfew? 

So i went to tour and thought nothing of them again.  Upon returning I discovered my husband-to-be had returned to Sally's (as she's known colloquially) and purchased the pair of them "for when we finally move in together".

So.  Five years later, and it pains me to talk about it, but the time had come to retire the velvet lovelies.  They were becoming worn--one was breaking--they couldn't keep up with our evolving aesthetic--they needed to be replaced.

With a heavy heart we cannibalized the swivel chair-- being theatre folk we cannot bear to toss out any piece of hardware that may be useful, and try to tell me that a swivel-chair apparatus won't come in handy sooner or later!  And it's solemn sister, the better-preserved of the two, was put on the side of our well-traveled road for tacit adoption.

Orange chair depicted right

I must've run more than a dozen times to the window to gaze out with nostalgic sentimentality--personifying the chair to the degree that I was actually worried about her out there, distressed that she might be feeling abandoned and unwanted.

But she WAS wanted!  Someone snapped that old dame up! it happened whilst I was at work.  My only hope is that she's gone to a loving family who will appreciate her retro charm!

Ok.

So then we had a chairless living room!

SERENDIPITY!
My first chair came in much the way my last one left us!  on my route to work someone was giving up a fantastically golden-chartreuse mid-century arm chair!  I didn't bite right away.  It took some mulling on my behalf, but ultimately I decided to adopt this darling accent chair. 

Hard to believe someone was getting rid of this for FREE!

And believe it or not-lol- nobody else had taken this bizarrely hued sweetheart!It is in near pristine condition, and is an Ethan Allen chair, so that bodes well (solid construction).  We altered it slightly--removing the oh-so-dated skirt to bring it into this century.  I febreezed it, vacuumed it, and sprayed it with this fabulous "No-Scratch" stuff that discourages cats from making furniture their personal scratching-post, and Voila!  One new chair.

The color is more...um...something in real life.

The Chartreuse is such an interesting accent in the apartment.  It feels more grown up than the orange ones, yet still just off-beat enough for us.

Now, for the next chair I really wanted a club chair or a slipper chair.  They come in so many great patterns and shapes!  I fell in love with at least a dozen possibilities.  I love chairs.  One of my favorite books (and I have a ridiculous amount of books) is this coffee table book called 1,000 Chairs.

Chair Bible

I sigh over chairs, I drool over chairs, I dream about them and want a million.

But have you seen the fucking price of goddamn chairs ever?

Holy Good God!

For a girl on a budget of slim-to-none, it is a far cry from FREE to over a hundred!  And all the really GOOD chairs, the ones that looked like they wouldn't go all goldilocks beneath the weight of a person of average-to more-than-average girth, those chairs are starting at 250--easy.

And did you want some style?  some panache?  some 'wow' factor?  Fucking forget it.

And so we did forget it.  Put it out of our minds.

And on a whim visited a new 'antique' store-- though I find it strange to call a store that sells things from the 70's an 'antique' store.  It is called The Eclectic Collection (no fucking website... rt 18 in abington) and boy was it ever!  It ranged from traditional antiques (great-grandma type of stuff), to art-neaveau, to art deco, to 50's diner charm, to 60 mod, mid-century moder, then to the 70's the 80's and even some new stuff made by artisans and craftspeople who are up-cycling old crap into stuff that looks half-way decent!

And there.  In a corner.  Inconspicuous.  Almost forgotten.  Sat love-at-first-sight.



I had one of those moments that hurts--those moments where you're spinning deep into love with an object and simultaneously reminding yourself that anything worth having in a store like this will cost more than you could dream of paying.  That clenching in your chest--knowing that NO ONE  could possibly love this secon-hand item more, appreciate it better than you, but that yoou will have to turn your back on it because you simply cannot afford to go spending that kind of...

wait.  What?  Is this a joke?  Is there something I'm not seeing?  No.  What's wrong with it?  Pull it away from the wall and check for some huge gash or something.  no...
What the fuck?  This must be mis-labeled.

A gorgeous, and I mean mouth-wateringly gorgeous deep-red leather armchair and matching ottoman.  for a measley, conceivably affordable (if we forgo groceries) $75.00.

Holy good lord.  I swear I made Aaron stay by it while I went to check that they hadn't had a stroke or other such mental lapse while tagging it. 

This oxblood beauty isn't just comfortable, she seems to embrace you when you sit--to hug you warmly as you sink into her.  She is like home.  And talk about good-looking!  PERFECTION!  All she needs is a cleaning. 

And I've always believed that a home should contain a good, solid leather chair.  Being a vegetarian, however, I've known that any such purchase could ONLY come as a second-hand item because I refuse to support the leather industry.  (I wish they could make a decent leather substitue, and for wallets and purses they are ok, but shoes? forget it.  And I don't even know why anytone bothers with furniture.  Sigh.  nothing wears and ages like leather.)

Aaron and I snapped her up.  We didn't have room in our car to take her home that day as we'd just purchased an incredible barstool (more later) and an amazing standing sewing machine at a yardsale.  So our gratification was of the delayed sort.

Oxblood makes her sound so... sophisticated!

And this gorgeous lady needed quite a rub down--and her odor is still a bit...musty? She smells like she's live with old folks for a long time.  But that'll disperse. 

She's gorgeous.

And the two of them flanking the entertainment center are perfection. 

And sooo comfortable as a gaming chair!

yellow(ish) and Red, and homage to our first furniture. 

More on the exciting world of second-hand furniture aquisition next time! I have to go watch...er, READ The Outsiders...


TEASER...

 

Making a List!

I have been wanting to post!  I'm keeping little mental notes now that get tagged as "To Blog!".

Perhaps this means a minor renaissance. 

Quick, avert your eyes!  The minor renaissance gets all self concious and won't do it while people are watching.

Ok.  Because I'm a forgetful person I've decided to make an ACTUAL list, rather than a MENTAL list, so that I can refer back to it as needed.  The deceptive permanent ether of the internet is preferable to the intangible that is my mind.

*Chairs
* Stones
*Jewelry
* Apothecary
* Medicine

See?  I've already forgotten some of hat I'm sure I was going to write?  Writers gotta write!  Even we virtually unreadable writers!  I tend to score incredibly high on the verbal/linguistic scale according to Mr. Gardner.  My intelligence tends toward WORD SMART.  Though because of my incredibly low score on logical/mathematical I am shit at scrabble.  I never angle to play the triple word score and double-letter bullshit.  I just like to make words, man!  I don't calculate the points until AFTER  i decide upon my word and place it.  That's why I'll only ever accidentally win at scrabble.

Ok.  Wait.  What just . . .

My list.  Right.

*Chairs
*Stones
*Jewelry
*Apothecary
*Medicine
*New Wave?
*Politics (sort of)
*Eclectic Shops & Antique stores

Probably also my job.

Ok.

There.

Will do.

Next post will be about one of those things.

I am actually excited.

Maybe later.

I'm home sick.  I love the autumn but every change of season lays me low!  I enjoyed every crisp, chilly moment of yesterday's first autumnal-feeling drive to work, though I knew it would fell me!

~Beth

Bullshit

The worry is that I'm not exactly giving this new job my all.  That I'm holding back.   Seems like there are a few possible explanations to this.  Though explanations do not cure, they ... well... they must do something, right?

Explanation 1:  I am naturally once bitten and thusly twice shy.  I gave every fibre of my being to the job last year and when measures I came up wanting!  It hurts like hell to be given the old heave-ho in the first place, but to be given the old heave-ho when you're deeply invested in becoming the best you can be for the kids, the school, and yourself?  yick.  My therapist says I'm still not over it.  I wonder "Well, when can I get over it please?"  but hey.

Explanation 2:  Not entirely unrelated to reason 1, but still... I don't love my career.  I don't.  There are elements I like powerfully enough to approximate love, I think.  But mostly?  I'm not as passionate about it as most of my peers, and thus I feel diminished right out of the gate.  I don't love it and so I end up kinda dreading it.

Explanation 3:  THis is DEFINITELY related to the others;  I don't know what the fuck I'm doing.  Aaron says I should stop saying this.  That it isn't true.  That by saying it as often as I do but becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.  But.  It is the god's honest truth.  I am qualified for this career on paper. But I am not qualified to do this job.  I know it in my heart, I know it intellectually, I know it in my fucking bones.  And I spent all of last year acting like I was new but definitely qualified, and you know what?  I'm tired of pretending.  And I did everything within my power to get more competent--I swear!  I listened, I watched, I read--I attended professional development and extra professional development, and more on top of that.

But.  Nope.  Not even a bit.  I sit down to lesson plan and it is torture.  Other people?  Sounds like fun to them.  IS fun for most!  Seems like it would be creative and liberating and exciting.  I guess it should be.  For me it is misery.  Drudgery.  Every bit of it means me making decisions that I'm doubting and second-guessing and stabbing around in the dark and hoping I have got something half-decent.

I'm a fraud.  A Charlatan.   An Imposter.  I'm an individual who is bright and can read and write well enough to bullshit my way into an English Teacher's requirements for education in this state and now I have this awesome responsibility and . . .

I feel trapped.  And guilty. 

The poeple I work with have been so welcoming and supportive.  The kids seem really great.  The community is lovely.  And all I can think is how I'm gunna fail them all.

Welcome to what its like for Ms. Reardon every morning noon and night.